It Only Hurts When I Blog

Hola, Bloggeros!

First - Charlie indulged me yesterday by letting me snap his photo in his turkey hunting gear. Here it is.

Thanks for being a good sport, Charlie!

That hand-held item which looks like the end of a plunger is a turkey call. You shake it and it makes gobbling noises. A technological marvel.

Anyhow - Charlie was out in the driveway hooting this morning, but nothing answered (maybe a few groggy neighbors but we couldn't hear them cursing). The turkeys that visited last week have not shown up this week. They're hiding out somewhere in their 'safe house', I'm sure.

Back to your regularly scheduled program...

I'm packing up this morning to go to New England for Easter weekend. I'll see the family, visit, have a huge Easter dinner, catch up on the news, and most importantly, drop off about 20 lbs of jam. Lets see, Heather wants strawberry, Mom wants peach, etc.

I hope my carryon bag can take it, and I sure hope it fits under the seat, or I'll have to get Hercules (or at least some big guy who can't spell Hercules) to lift it into an overhead bin.

I'm leaving my car at a 'Park and Fly' kind of place near the airport. I LOVE THESE PLACES. If you've never tried one, here's how it goes...

You drive into the front lot. A representative looks you up on his handheld computer. He asks you when you're returning, and if you'd like your car detailed while you're gone. Then he gives you the phone number to call for pickup. That's it. No paperwork - after all, they have your vehicle! Meanwhile, they have moved your baggage for you to their shuttle.

You step into your gilded coach like the princess you are, and are whisked away to the airport, where you are deposited at your airline of choice.

The photo you see here is from Storyland in New Hampshire. I'm in there somewhere.

All for the same price as economy parking. No brainer, that one. Especially nice when you have heavy bags or it's raining.

We USED to have a company airport shuttle at WORK, but it got downsized even before I did.

I've already printed my boarding pass, but I need to check my luggage. One bag; a few clothes, various goodies for the family, the newspaper from the day after the tornadoes, and a box of famous Sturms whole grain cranberry oatmeal. My mother hates oatmeal, but I've raved about Sturms so much she is considering trying it. That, my blogging friends, is what marketing is all about.

I pack neatly going TO my destination. I don't really care on the way back.

I have my cell phone charger in my purse so I can plug it in at the airport and get free electricity. That one little 'gimme' helps justify the hours of tedium that is airline travel.

Thankfully it is not snowing anywhere on my travel route. I have been stranded in Colorado and Chicago in the past due to snow, and I also dislike landing on a runway covered in snow. I have endured various plane malfunctions and delays, fainting passengers, and annoying tourists. Here's a couple of highlights...

Once someone on the previous flight left their briefcase on the plane. The stewardess, who was busy chatting it up with the man who stocks the beverages, didn't see it, so it was unnoticed until the next flight - MINE. We had to wait on the plane for several HOURS so the bomb squad could remove it and scan it.

Last summer my flight was diverted from Atlanta to South Carolina due to thunderstorms, then experienced hydraulic trouble so it couldn't return. We were all put on buses and bussed back to Atlanta, where the airport was still in shut down mode. It ended up taking me 24 hours to get from Maine to Nashville.

What I didn't mention is when I exited the plane in South Carolina, I noticed a little girl waiting over at the gate counter. It was my cousins daughter, who was traveling as an unaccompanied minor on her way home. This was 'supposed' to be a non-stop flight. Long story short, after a few phone calls she was 'signed out' to me and we all made it to Atlanta and met my cousin around 2am. After that, I had a never ending cycle of standby flights to Nashville to get home. Ugh. I am still annoyed at the Atlanta airport.

I could tell more airport stories but maybe I'll save that for another blog, this is getting long and Blogger crashed in the middle of my second posting.

My daughter is picking me up at the airport in Providence. Thanks, Heather!

I'm staying with my daughter, son-in-law, their cat, and their dog Clyde. Clyde doesn't really like house company. I startle him and he startles me - we're compatible that way. He spends most of his time in my daughters lap, even though he weighs over 50 lbs.

I'll be writing 'da blog' for the next several days on my daughter's computer, so stay tuned. As she says 'The Blog Must Go On'!

Have a nice day and Love You Bye!

If anything should happen while I am flying, remember that I donate my blog to science.

Update... It's 10:19am.

My suitcase is in the car, along with my carryon bag. The weight of my carryon BEFORE I put in my book, my sweater, a snack, and a drink was 18.5 pounds. My pocketbook probably weighs in around five - I don't want to know.

Most important parts of the 'going on a trip' checklist:

Am I wearing slip-on shoes, because you have to take them off at security.
Am I wearing socks with no runs in the toes? Mustn't have our toes showing.
Do I have my... luggage, boarding pass, itinerary, license, carryon, cell phone, charger, etc.
Does my suitcase have a luggage tag? Well guess what - most of my baggage has my BUSINESS CARD on a tag on it. I'll have to replace them all with my name and address. Sheesh.
Did I go to the bank and get some money? Very important item there. The answer is no, I have to go today.
Do I have some 'ones' for tips? I might want to bribe someone to carry my carryon. Check.

By the way - I once received a counterfeit one dollar bill in downtown Nashville. At a food booth at a craft fair, no less. Along with my other change, I didn't even notice it. When you count your change, you just fan out the bills and look at the corners, don't you? Upon closer inspection, not only was it counterfeit, it was also pornographic. 'Nuff said about that. I wonder where that is...

Okey dokey, smokies. Guess I'm ready to go to the bank. TTFN!